dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
