We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
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eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
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What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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