i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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