Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
