He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize