Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize