And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
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Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Drunk is not a location!
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
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