remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
