bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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