my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
