Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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