Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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