just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
