think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize
