what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
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