dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
