Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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