My brain says no but my pants say off.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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