the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize