Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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