I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
