Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
