were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
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