I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
sex in a hospital.. check
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Randomize
