I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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