Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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