Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
