well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
