well most of my day revolves around power hour
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Are we still banned from the library?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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