i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
