ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
