lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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