this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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