Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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