He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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