if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
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He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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