apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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