At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
My feet surprised me
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
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