i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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