if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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