How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
