Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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