I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
