You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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