Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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