where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
