wat bout pragnant strippers??
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize