shes about as inviting as chlamydia
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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