Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
