That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Randomize
