At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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