just tell him i said nine months
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
